I'm sorry to hear this, especially as you are sounding generally very down.

You're right that you can do nothing to make your family behave like adults. It's very sad, but sometimes that's just how things are. And you certainly shouldn't change for them.

I hope you're OK.

(Cue Catherine's solution to all the problems of the world: Come down to Melbourne some time and I'll feed you...? That is a genuine invitation, by the way. If you need time away and can get down to this end of the world, you would be very welcome to stay, if you can cope with cats who own us, and a very messy house)